Conspiracy Theory Generator

What follows are two conspiracy theory generators. They are instructional devices used to explore how conspiracism as a genre is a structured combination of a stylistic meta-frame of tragic apocalyptic dualism merged with narratives built around the components of demonization and scapgoating.

While some of the resulting stories may be absurd (and offensive), often the result (or a very similar result) can be found in texts on contemporary internet websites. The conspiracy theory generators may appear on the surface as overly glib for the subject matter, but they are meant to illustrate that there is a paradigm, framework, or architecture to conspiracy theories.

Note: Your computer must accept running a small Java script for the wording to change. Sometimes there is a small box about protecting security and requesting permission to run "active content" near the top of this screen.

What's Really Going On?

The original opening text on the narrative below reflects the basic allegations in the hoax document, the Protocols of the Elders of Zion.

Select a proponent

Compose Your Own Conspiracy Theory

In order to understand the world today American politics World history who controls us why we are kept down you need to realize that everything is controlled by a conspiracy plot secret cabal religious underground group of adepts made up of Jews Freemasons the Illuminati Bankers Jewish Bankers bankers who belong to the Illuminati bankers in the City of London Jewish bankers in the City of London Jewish Illuminati bankers in London the Rothschild family Cosmopolitans the Knights Templar Secular Humanists the Rockefellers the Bilderberger group the Trilateralists the Council on Foreign Relations Neoconservatives Liberals Catholics Jesuits Opus Dei New Agers Satanists NeoNazis really old Nazis space aliens space alien lizard people .

The conspirators are crafty powerful sinister evil agents of the Antichrist and their conspiracy began in ancient Babylon with the Rabbis at a meeting of the Skull and Bones Society in America, during the Roosevelt Administration in America, during the Civil War when we left the Gold Standard when the IRS was created by the Banksters at a meeting of plutocrats on Jekyll Island in Georgia with John Dewey and the takeover of public education when Darwin created the hoax of evolution when the Unitarians stole Harvard from the Calvinists with The Enlightenment in Europe, during the Crusades with the struggle between Plato and Aristotle in the Garden of Eden .

The conspirators have been responsible for many events throughout history, including The French Revolution The Russian Revolution the attacks on 9/11 the first Gulf War World War I World War II all wars since World War I the feminist movement the homosexual movement the Kennedy assassination global warming .

Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified only by their membership in the Learned Elders of Zion their religion their ethnicity their race their political ideas the club they belonged to in college the club they belong to now their alien DNA .

The conspirators have help from powerful elite Freemasons intellectuals journalists corrupt politicans wealthy corporate owners plutocrats puppet masters secret Kingmakers , and the conspiracy benefits undeserving sinful parasites lazy parasites subversive parasites lazy, sinful, and subversive parasites illegal immigrants crooks people on welfare ; at the expense of Russian Orthodox Christians Christians the real producers in society White people heterosexuals men straight White heterosexual men the average American .

The conspirators want to oppress rob harass hurt drain the precious bodily fluids from expel torture kill all God-Fearing Christians God-Fearing Muslims God-Fearing Jews God-Fearing Hindus True Patriots Real Americans followers of Lyndon LaRouche Black people White people gay people straight people straight White heterosexual Christian men , and round up and restrain resisters in the Jewish Ghetto work camps the Antichrist's dungeons Masonic halls remote prisons hidden caves old fallout shelters secret concentration camps their own bodies using mind control . They are using subversive agents Mossad black helicopters black-booted stormtroopers Black Ops agents the Black Guelph Nobility the CIA FEMA Chemtrails space aliens with advanced technology to establish the reign of the Antichrist a New World Order a tryanny a global government a one world government a corporate state .

In order to prepare for this, we all must attack them before they attack us stockpile weapons stockpile food and water go up on the mountain and pray go up on the mountain, find a cave, and hide dig a backyard shelter wait for the Rapture march in Washington take out advertisements in the New York Times take over Pacifica Radio send e-mail to everyone we know kill them all...let God sort them out . All of this was revealed years ago in The Protocols of the Elders of Zion in the book of Revelation in the Bible by Senator McCarthy by the John Birch Society by Nesta Webster by Elizabeth Dilling by pastor Wesley Swift by Henry Ford by Father Coughlin by Hitler . Since the media is controlled by Jewish journalists liberals gays secular humanists communists Jews Zionists Muslims the rich the secret elites political correctness lizard aliens you should get your information only from Czarist loyalists a truth-telling Internet website a truth-telling AM radio talk show a truth-telling shortwave radio program a truth-telling secret source our pastor pretribulationist premillennial dispensationalists God me the New American magazine Guns and Ammo magazine the American Free Press newspaper David Icke Lyndon LaRouche native-borm Americans our White Aryan brothers people gifted with remote viewing the guy who secretly flew Bush to Paris Commander Hatonn from the Pleiades .

The original idea and coding is based on a similar generator at the website Turn Left!